A Way Through the Weeds:
Guidance for women navigating divorce and abuse
Resources
The following are resources I have found helpful in my journey through the weeds. This is certainly not an exhaustive list, and perhaps not even the best one, but it will hopefully give you a place to start. Please message me with other suggestions.
Abuse
Divorce
Self-Care
National Domestic Abuse Hotline
tel: +1-800-799-7233
With a 24-hour telephone hotline, website, and blog, this is a key resource for anyone who is in an abusive relationship or thinks they may be. (Believe me, it is not always easy to tell.) Visit them online at http://www.thehotline.org/.
How I Came to Sparkle Again
by Kaya McLaren
This deceptively profound novel touches on nearly every heartbreak a woman can experience: miscarriage, adultery, divorce, death. It is simultaneously very real, very tender, very humorous, and very cathartic. (Uncle Howard is the voice of wisdom we all need in times of trial.)
Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life
by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend
This is arguably the seminal book on personal boundaries: what they are, why you need them, and how to develop them. It changed my life. Really. If you often feel like you're acting out of guilt, others' expectations, or anything other than willingness and love, this book is for you.
The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships
by Harriet Lerner, Ph.D.
Don't let the title fool you: EVERYONE should read this book. Lerner takes anger out of the role of "bad emotion #1" and puts it back into it's proper place: a signal that something is "rotten in the State of Denmark" and the impetus to do something about it. I devoured it in one day and promptly started over again, much more slowly. In the past two years, I must have read it cover-to-cover at least three times.
Facing Love Addiction: Giving Yourself the Power to Change the Way You Love
by Pia Mellody
This is a book for those who find themselves "looking for love in all the wrong places" or, conversely, those who repeatedly pursue relationships only to find themselves suffocating and looking for a way out. If that sounds like you, welcome to the club of love addicts and love avoidants. Great news, though: we can get healthy, and Mellody is a terrific helper!
How I Came to Sparkle Again
by Kaya McLaren
This deceptively profound novel touches on nearly every heartbreak a woman can experience: miscarriage, adultery, divorce, death. It is simultaneously very real, very tender, very humorous, and very cathartic. (Uncle Howard is the voice of wisdom we all need in times of trial.)